


These Hands I Hold

by Captainrogerthat



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Farm/Ranch, Bisexual Steve Rogers, Clint Barton's Farm, Coming Out, Flashback to Childbirth, Gay James "Bucky" Barnes, Implied Mpreg, M/M, Parent Steve Rogers, Post-Avengers (2012), Pre-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Secret Marriage, Team Dynamics, Trans Steve Rogers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:35:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22852600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Captainrogerthat/pseuds/Captainrogerthat
Summary: After the battle of New York,  Steve Rogers disappears off the face of the Earth. Three years later, the Avengers are faced with a mountain of secrets.[Set after the Avengers (2012), pre-Captain America Winter Solider, Canon Divergent]
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Phil Coulson/Clint Barton
Comments: 3
Kudos: 88





	1. Part I

When Steve first woke up, he thought he could never find joy again. Not when his world was divided into the befores and afters. Before the war, when he might have had nothing, but he had Bucky. It was Bucky who picked up a pair of rusty kitchen scissors shortly after Steve came out.

He cut Steve's hair when and helped him fashion clothes from his father's closet. They laid on their bellies and chose Steve's name together. Bucky always understood Steve, saw him as the man he was always meant to be.They got married when Steve was eighteen and Bucky was nineteen. They moved away from their childhood neighborhood to make sure Steve could be himself.

Their life was hard, dealing with hunger, illness, and struggle. But it was their life, butterfly kisses, dancing in the moon light and making love under the stars. Then the war came, and Bucky received a letter calling him to fight a war thousands of miles away.

Meeting Dr. Erskine changed Steve's life, giving him the body that matched who he always saw himself to be. He rescued Bucky from the jaws of hell, and for a short while, they were reunited.War was ugly, it warped them, blood, loss, and death. But Steve had Bucky, and Bucky had Steve, for a time it was enough. There are afters Steve would rather forget. The aftermath of losing Bucky was earth shattering. A part of himself died that day, and then he put the plane into the icy waters of the Atlantic ocean.

In some horrific turn of events, Steve didn't die in a watery grave. No, it turns out he is much harder to kill. Waking up in a world without Bucky and everyone he loved./p>

Living is much worse a punishment for the mortal sin of trying to kill himself. You might say Steve and his childhood Catholicism remain at odds with each other to this day. Guilt. shame, and trauma penetrate every aspect of part of his waking hours.

He finds out the war he gave his blood, sweat and tears is meaningless. Nick Fury and SHIELD don't leave the tesseract in the bottom of the ocean where it belongs. If the world hadn't been in grave danger, Steve might've walked away together.

The battle of New York plants seeds of doubt in Steve's wiliness to trust SHIELD. Once more he dawned the red, white, and blue. The colors once sparked pride in his country, but now he can taste the ash and gun powder in his mouth.

The red reminds him of war, the white of death , and the blue of a shallow, watery grave as he struggled for every breath.

Eight weeks after fighting another war, Steve found out he was pregnant. He had felt like a stranger in his own body, struggling with nausea, frequent urination, soreness, and exhaustion.Googling his symptoms led him to conclude he needed to take a pregnancy test, just to rule it out. Given the medical testosterone he was taking under Erskine's guidance, and continued to take when he woke,

Steve didn't realize pregnancy was possible. More research led Steve to discover transgender men who safely got pregnant, and gave birth to healthy newborns. He decided then to go off the grid, distrustful of Fury and SHIELD. Part of him wanted to trust his team, having read their dossiers, and completed their risk assessments.

A nagging feeling in his gut make him chose a different path. Steve made preparations over the period of four weeks: gathering supplies, weapons, a vehicle, and fake identities. He threw a dart a map, and make a home in rural Indiana for himself.

Steve bought a farm with apple trees, goats, chickens, a dog and a little yellow house. He made himself a home, for the first time in a long time, his hands were soft. He cared for the earth, and his animals with a tenderness.

It was there Steve let himself heal again, learning to fall in love with the little ones who grew in his womb. With no neighbors for four miles, he build himself a peaceful life.

He gave birth in cold winter weather of November during a snow storm. On November 16th, 2013 on the coldest night of the year, Steve welcomed Lukan "Luke" Jameson Rogers , a dark haired eight pound four ounce baby boy.

And Lukan’s twin sister, Bridget Elizabeth Rogers, at eight pounds, two ounces. She looked every bit like her brother. Luke and Bridget looked every bit like Bucky, with their dark hair, lips, face, and nose. Steve's world was rocked forever, now he had these little people to love and protect.

It was as if apart of his love for Bucky continued to be alive in the world. The last three years has been full of nows. Steve's life is filled with love, laughter and sunshine. His two year olds love to laugh, and shows Steve how to see in color again.

He looks forward to wake up, making breakfast, caring for the animals, and making time with his children. Steve should've known his picture perfect life couldn't last forever. Parenthood had him soft slower, he should've been more guard more.

Days after his children’s second birthday, Steve makes his morning rounds, feeding the animals while Luke and Bridget are asleep. He takes his time, taking to the chickens as he collects eggs and feeds them.

Steve cares for the goats, milks the cow, and fed the horse. When he returns to the house, Steve knows someone else in the house. Panic seizes his limbs, knowing Luke and Bridget are sleep asleep down the hall. His eyes train in to locate Nick Fury sitting at his dinning room table.

Steve is angry, putting his body between Fury and the hallway. He has a gun in his hand in an instance, pointed at Fury. He freezes for a moment when a little, quiet sleepy voice calls out.

"Daddy?", Bridget yawns clinging to Steve's leg.

Luke is quietly sucking his thumb, clinging to his blanket, as he quietly stands beside his sister.

"Luke and Bridget, help Daddy with the case." 'The little ones quickly departs back up the stairs as Steve quietly prays under his breath. He might still be at odds with his childhood faith, but fatherhood made him the praying type again. Anything to keep his children, safe, a pleading with God, the universe, someone.  
  


"Stand down, Rogers." , Fury called out, never lowering his gun, but at least choosing to point away from the vital organs in Steve's body. "I don't take orders from you.", Steve snarled. 

"You have kids." "None of your concern really."

"Are they why you disappeared off the face of the Earth?"

"I had to keep my children safe."

"If you can put the gun down, we can talk about this."

"Why are you here?", Steve growled.

"A pain in my ass. Figured if we were looking for you, so where they."

"Who is they?"

"Our enemies."

Their conversation was caught short by the hail of gunfire that broke though. Steve ducked quickly, he and Fury returned fire, but were outgunned.

His eyes caught sight of a masked man, about 6 feet tall, 250 pounds with a metal arm.   
  


Steve chases after the man, throwing his shield at him. He is surprised when the masked man catches it and throws it back. The blond is left stunned, but quietly returns to Fury’s side.

The older man is bleeding badly from a chest wound. Steve tries to contain the bleeding, he uses the medical kit from his supplies. Military grade, aborsent tissue to stop the bleeding until Fury can get medical help. They agree to gather the kids, supplies, and bring Fury to SHIELD medical.

Steve leds Fury to his office, the kids are hiding in a chest in their father’s office. Fury limps with Steve to the car parked out front. Steve has a kid on his hip, and another way in a toddler backpack carrier on his back.

Once the kids are buckled into their car seats, Steve throws the car into reverse. He eyes Fury with murder eyes, the father is pissed.

”I’m sorry things went this way.”

”You’re bleeding in my car in the middle of BFE and my kids are the backseat.”

“Never saw you as a mini van guy, Rogers.”, Fury joker.

”Kids change things, Colonel.”

“I wish you told me.”

”You should’ve left the Tesseract in the ocean.”

”Fair enough.”

”Enough chit-chat. What is the plan, Sir?”

”I have a base about fifteen miles from here. My personal staff, they're friends of ours.”

”Of course, you do..”

”I had to keep an eye on you.”

”You really didn’t.”

”Motherfucker, that’s hurts.”, Fury groans when the van hits a pothole.

”Language.”

“Don’t trust anyone, Rogers.”

”As if I can trust you.”, Steve scoffed.

”Keep this. You’ll need it.” Fury passed him a Flash drive, and Steve tucks it into his pocket.

Steve tells the kids a story to keep them entertained and Fury awake. It feels like a long drive to the base.

Everything happens very quickly, Fury is taken away for emergency surgery while Steve sits in the waiting room with this kids.   
  


He is greeted by a familiar face, and is surprised. Steve is surprised by how excited he is to see her. He is on his feet in an instant.

“Natasha?”

”Steve!”

”You’re alive.”

Natasha gives him a big hug, and he accepts.

”Daddy?”, a little voice calls out. Bridget is holding tightly to his leg, and Luke is behind his sister.

”Yeah, bug?”

”Who is this?”

”This is my friend, Natasha.”

“Hi!”, Bridget smiles, poking her head out.

”Hi, sweetie.”

”Are they yours?”

”Yeah, this is Bridget and Luke.”

Luke waves shyly, wanting to be held by his Dad. Steve picks his son up, and takes a seat with Natasha.

”Fury is dead, Steve.”

”Fuck.”

”Wanna tell me what happened?”

”I found Fury in my farmhouse. Then gun fire broke out, a masked man attacked us.”

”Can you describe him?”

”6 feet tall, 250 pounds and he had a metal arm. He caught my shield, Nat.”

”Did he have a red star on his arm?”

”Shit.”

”Do you know him?”

”They call him the Winter Solider. He is a ghost story.”

”Have you encountered him?”

”Iran, mid 2000s. He put a bullet in my gut. Can’t wear a bikini anymore.”   
  


“I’m sure you look great.”

”You wound me. Seriously, though, Don’t want to bark up bus tree, Rogers. It won’t end well.”

”I don’t think he was after Fury.”

”Who knows about you and the kids?”

”SHIELD apparently, and our enemies. Fury didn’t specify.”

”We should call the team.”

”How do we know who to trust?”

”We don’t.”

”This is a terrible idea.”

”What choice do you have, Rogers?”

”I don’t know.”


	2. Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything is not what it seems.

After the kids are down for their afternoon nap, Steve makes his decision. He can't fight this Winter Solider on his own, not with two toddlers in toe. Natasha gives him space, and waits in a conference room until Steve arrived at a decision.  
  


Her eyes are kinder than he remembers. Part of Steve regrets hiding from his team mates, he has come to learn that they never stopped looking for him. Apparently, Fury has known for a while where Steve was based. They weren't sure what to make the kids, but a photo of Steve shopping at the local grocery store with the twins had gone viral. Fury's personal inner circle tried to shut it down.

It seems they were unsuccessful, given the arrival of the Winter Solider in rural Indiana. They were able to spin a story, and tried to protect Steve's family from the public. It was not enough to throw their enemies off the trail,unfortunately.

"What is the plan, Captain?"

"I need somewhere safe for the kids. Then we're taking down this Winter Solider."

"Are you sure you want to go down that road?"

"I can't rest until I know my kids are safe."

"What are my orders, Captain?”

“Avengers Assemble.”

Steve carries the twins onto the Quinjet. They’re still sleepy, and compliant.Once the kids’ car seats are installed and the twins are bucked, Steve takes a seat beside Natasha.

Steve doesn’t breaths word about the flash drive and Fury’ warning. He reads the case files Natasha gave him. There is something eerily nagging him to dig further into this case. Call it a gut instinct, Steve knows he has to go down this road even if he can't explain why. 

It’s not much, there are a least fifty assassinations associated with the Winter Solider, but little evidence beyond it. But the scraps of information he can uncover reveal a brutal, efficient killer.   
  


Within forty five minutes the Quinjet lands, Steve carries his toddlers off the plane. He has a kiddo on each hip, carrying a diaper bag and his shield on his back. He can't imagine what this sight will look like to his team. His hair is longer than it was the last time they saw him, with a beard, and tan. His hands are rough from hard labor, yet soft enough to be an artist and care for his children.

The Captain follows Natasha to the conference room where the Avengers are seated.He can see in their eyes the questions they have.

Steve is holding two clingy toddlers when he arrived in the room. From his diaper bag, Steve puts snacks and toys on the table for the kids.

Steve clears his throat, “Team, I want you to meet Luke and Bridget. They’re my children.”

He can feel the weight of five pairs of eyes on him.

”You’re a father?”, Bruce asked softly.

”Yeah, found out I was pregnant about eight weeks after the Battle of New York.”

”How is that possible? No never mind, that’s rude.”, Tony shook his head.

”It’s okay to ask. I’m a trans man. Must’ve gotten pregnant before Buck died, and I didn’t know it.”

”Who is Bucky?”, Clint asked.

”Sargent James Buchanan Barnes. We were got married several years before he was drafted.”, Steve clears his throat, twisting the golden wedding band on his finger. He can feel the cold metal of his dog tags against his skin, reminders of the weighty loss he bares.

  
  


”I’m so sorry, Captain.”

”It’s just Steve. Me too, I’m thankful I have our kids though.”

“Why did you leave, Shield brother?”, Thor asked.   
  


“I don’t trust anyone to keep my family save.”

”What’s the plan, Cap?”

”I need somewhere safe for the kids. Then we need to find the bastard who killed Fury.”

”The twins can with my family.”, Clint offered pulling a picture of his rambunctious brood.

”I didn’t know you had kids either.”, Steve said.

“After Phil died, I knew I had to keep them safe. Work and home are separate. The nanny cares for them when I’m not home.”

"Are you sure, Clint?”

”Yeah, I wouldn’t mind going home, Sir. I could keep an eye on the kiddos.”

Steve takes a deep breath, “As soon as they need to go into hiding, I’ll send ‘em to yours.”

”What are we up against?”

"They call him the Winter Solider.”

"How should we get started?", Tony asked.

"Tony, can you and Jarvis pull as much as you can from the SHIELD database?"

"Aye, Aye, Cap."

"Natasha, I want you to run tactical simulations. We need a strategy to combat the Winter Solider, and you've fought him before."

"Sure."

"Bruce, I want medical here and on the jet stocked.

Bruce nodded, moving to attend to his task.

"Thor, could you help me watch the kids?"

"Of course. I'd love to."

"Clint, and Natasha, mind helping me with a supply run?"

"How can we help?"

"We're going to shopping. Let's get some things for the twins."

Steve spends part of the afternoon stocking up on diapers, snacks, tools, clothes, and travel beds for the twins. Not knowing where they're going is a bit stressful, but he keeps his shit together. Clint is actually good help, pushing the cart and keeping Steve moving. Natasha keeps an eye on their security, walking behind them. It's been a long time since Steve has been in public, able to shop in person without the twins. In the middle of the store, Steve's hand lingers on a stuffed animal. 

He tries to be discreet wiping away the tears in his eyes with his hand. Steve catches a soft, kind, but inquisitive glance. The young father moves to put the stuffed Bucky bear in the cart and grabs a second one. He knew they existed, having seen the pictures. But here he was fronted with a memory of his past, Bucky Bears had become popularized after the War. Yet here they are, in the middle of the baby section at Target. 

"You okay, Steve?" 

"It's dumb."

"You are hurting, that's not dumb to me."

"The bear. They're made to look like my husband.", Steve tosses one to Clint.

"I'm sure he was one hell of a solider." 

Steve sniffled, "He was fierce on battlefield, rousing and steady." 

"You must miss him." 

"Always.I lost him seventy years ago, but it feels like yesterday."

"When Phil died two years ago and it felt like my entire world shattered."

"I woke up in a different century, alone, pregnant, and all my friends have grown old or died. We fight a battle over the same damn weapon I left buried in the ocean."

"You don't have to shoulder this burden alone."

"I don't really think anyone gets me, Clint."

"That's one hell of a lifetime for one 26 year old to deal with." 

Steve laughs sadly, "Yeah it is." 

"Take your time. We aren't in a hurry." 

"Yeah, you're right."

"Man to man, pal. It's one hell of a job, trying to be a single dad, Avenger, and grieving husband."

"Thank you for understanding.", Steve offers a soft, private sad smile. 

"What's next?", Clint asks, keeping him moving,   
  


"I just need to pick up a few items for myself." 

"I can push the cart.", Clint offers, giving him some privacy. 

Steve wonders across the aisle to the men's clothing section. He picks several pairs of jeans, a few t-shirts, a pull over, and athletic wear. One look at his cowboy boots, the captain grabs a pair of sneakers and socks. He glances through the list one more time, and finding each item accounted for walks towards the register. Clint offers a smile to the cashier, making small talk about the weather. Steve is quiet, moving to put the bagged items into the cart. 

Natasha uses the Avengers credit cart to pay for the items and steers Steve towards the car. Clint notices just how quiet his captain has grown. He can't help but wonder what Steve is processing, but whatever it is troubles him. 

The silent drive back to Avengers' Tower is abruptly interrupted by a masked figured. Clint, Nat and Steve fight to dodge a rain of bullets, as the masked figured continues his assault onto the Honda Civic. Clint is trying to keep the car straight on the congested street.

While Steve digs for the gun, Clint braces himself for impact seeing the car behind them hit them from behind. The Winter Solider is thrown onto the pavement, and they watches as he steadies himself with his metal hand graciously finding his footing. His metal hand sparks against the asphalt, and he jumps back onto the hood of the car. Breaking through the windshield, the Winter Solider pulls the steering column out of the Honda Civic. Springing forward, the Winter Solider jumps off the Honda Civic and onto the dark Hummer that rammed them earlier. 

Steve, shield in hand thinks quickly, "Hold on." As the car begins to flip, Steve breaks the glass with his shield. Natasha and Steve are thrown to the left, as Clint is thrown to the right against the asphalt of the roadway. His heart races, ears ringing and body thrumming as the adrenaline spreads across his shaky limbs. Steve scatters to his feet, shield in one hand and gun in the other.

In the corner of his eye, he can see Clint angry, gun in his hand, prepared for a fight. Taking a deep breath, Natasha pops off two shots, landing one bullet in the Winter's solider leg before the Winter Solider struts towards them with a grenade launcher. She is pushed out of the way, and ducks behind a car. Steve's shield takes the brunt of the force, but he is thrown backwards several hundred feet. 

Natasha and the Winter Solider exchange fire, she dodges, running towards the bus Steve was thrown through. Clint isn't far behind her, exchanging fire, ducking behind cars. She takes a bullet in the shoulder, as the Winter Solider circles her, Steve rushes towards the Winter Solider as the next shot pings against the shield. He ducks, avoiding fire. Hidden behind a car, he watches from the corner of his eye, Clint is closing in on Natasha's location, exchanging fire with the armed men the Winter Solider was with. 

Steve sees an opportunity to toss his shield against the Winter Solider, but the masked man catches it and lodges it into a car. He moves quickly to dodge, the knife the Winter Solider now holds in his hand. Disarming him, they engage in hand to hand combat. The Winter Solider is bring punch after punching, leaving Steve to block and doge as he works towards where his shield is lodged. Seizing opportunity, he pins the Winter Solider momentarily, and watches as the mask comes off. 

Landing back on his feet, the Winter Solider turns his head as he stands across from Steve whose mouth is now open wide in shock. Steve squares his shoulders, a thousand emotions running through his mind all at once. It is difficult to focus, a fight to calm his brain, and catch his breath. He is looking at a ghost, the face of his formerly dead lover, and father of his children,.

"Bucky?"

"Who the hell is Bucky?", the Winter Solider pivots his body, ready to kill, as he points a gun at Steve. 

Steve is pushed aside by Clint who rams him into a car. The Winter Solider and Steve are staring at each other. Before the Winter Solider can shoot Steve point back, Natasha throws a smoke grenade and Clint pulls Steve along. In an instance, the Winter Solider is gone, and the three Avengers survey the damage. A quick call to the police commissioner to close this section of the city is made, and they wait until NYPD arrives on the scene. 

Steve sits on the side of the street in disbelief. Clint salvages what he can from the wreckage of the car, and Natasha helps Steve up. They wait for a very overprotective Tony to arrive with a car to pick them up. Steve finds the flash drive Furry gave him still in his pocket. As the other three discuss what the hell just happened, Steve sighs, he thinks he knows what the Winter Solider was after.

"What did he want?", Tony asks. 

"This.", Steve shows them the flash drive in his pocket.

"Why?"

"I don't know yet, been trying to figure that out."

  
"First of all, you didn't tell us? And then you kept it on your person. Are you a totally moron?", Tony shouts.

  
  
  
"Fury died trying to get it to me."

"And you don't trust us?", Tony sounds very hurt. 

"He said not to trust anyone."

"You come to me for help, I invite you into my home, and this is how you treat me?", Tony mumbles. 

"Enough, that's not going to help anyone.", Natasha raises her voice. 

"Look, he just found out his husband is alive and the Winter Solider, think you could cut him some slack?"

"I want to know why. Why did you even come to us if you don't want to trust us?"

"My kids, Tony. I can't do this without help."

"Then, I'm gonna need you to work on trust us."

"I'm really sorry, Tony.", Steve says quietly, holding onto the flash drive. He looks green all of a sudden, like he is going to throw up. Natasha skillfully, hands him a paper bag rubbing his back as he is sick. He sounds pitiful, retching more than once. Clint can sense how shaken up, Steve is, and he glances at Tony, pleading that he relaxes just a smidge. 


	3. Part 3

Steve's been on the verge of a freak out, and all it takes to set it in motion is agitation from Tony. It took a long time to get his breathing under control after a nasty panic attack as he was getting out of the car. It takes a little bit of oxygen support, and coaxing from Bruce to get him settled. It's a long afternoon at Avenger's Tower. Clint, Natasha, and Steve all get a check up from Bruce. Steve is mostly bruised, but a few cuts needed stitches. Natasha sustained a gun shot wound, and need the bullet removed from her shoulder. Clint has a broken nose, and a concession from being thrown from the car. 

Steve takes a shower after getting the all clear from Bruce. When he returns in clean clothes, he checks on his kids who are very glad to see their dad. He kneels onto their level, and gives them both a big hug. 

"Daddy!", Luke and Bridget squeal.

"Hi, guys.", Steve kisses them both, cradling them in his arms. He notices the little Bucky bear tucked under Luke's hand, and offers his teammates a quiet glance.

"Draw?"

"Sure, bug. Daddy's going to work a case. You can sit on my lap if you want."

Bridget nods in agreement, taking Steve's hand. Luke is more than happy to let Thor carry him back to the common area of the Avenger's tower. Despite their injuries, Natasha and Clint are seated on one of the couches. It looks like nothing slows either of them down, not even mild injuries. Steve sighed at the sight of toys, games, and toddler appealing activities strung across the common area. It looks like Tony and Bruce got to work on the savaged items from the Target trip.

"Can you tell us everything?", Tony asks softly. 

"Yeah. I guess you deserve the truth.", Steve clears his throat.

"Take your time.", Bruce offers, trying to relieve the tension between Tony and Steve. 

"How are you feeling, Captain?", Thor asks, concerned for the well being of their team leader.

"It's been one hell of few days. I will be okay. I'm alive, my children are safe, and my team is back together."

With his teammates gather around, Steve pulls the flash drive out of his pocket and sets it on the coffee table. 

"The Winter Solider is James Buchanan Barnes. Shield is compromised, and Nick Fury is dead. Oh, and my home was bugged."

"Was Barnes working with Hydra?", Natasha asked.

"I don't think so. He was held hostage, and I recused him as well as most of the 101th. I noticed he was different, stronger, enhanced, not as strong as me, but damn near close." 

"You think he's worth saving, after what he did to Fury, to us?", Natasha doesn't sound sure.

"He deserves a chance." 

"Steve, who do you think has infiltrated Shield?", Clint asked, a troubled look on his face.

"That's what we need to find out. Someone is behind the Winter Solider program."

"What's on the flash drive?", Tony asked. 

"I've not taken a look at it yet." 

  
"It's now or never."

"You're right."

  
Steve pushes the flash-drive towards Tony.

"Wait, the moment we plug that sucker in, Shield is gonna know exactly where we....", Natasha interrupts. 

"Yeah, Level Six honing program. I know.", Tony rolls his eyes.

"Just be careful, alright?"

"Look princess, they can come and get us. We aren't going anywhere."

  
"I'm just saying, be prepared for a fight." 

"Jarvis, commence protocol Foxtrot."

  
The lock is locked down, the windows darken as silver armor shields the doors and windows. Tony's quick fingers begin to work towards suppressing their IP address and conceal their location. His quick brain fighting to throw Shield off their scent. He types and a holographic scene displays the computer screen for all to be able to see what he is seeing.

"This software is wicked smart, trying to overwrite my commands. Too bad for them, I've got a smarter AI."

"Can you override it?"

"This person is not quite as smart as me, so I think so. Nat, wanna give me a hand?", Tony gestures towards a second keyboard.

"Sure. Let me try to run a tracer. I know of a program Shield developed to track malware..." 

"If we can't read the file, we can trace it. You're almost as much of a genius as me."

"Shut up, and keep working, Stark."

  
"Why don't you make me?"

"I'll stab you."

"Kinky."  
  


Natasha gives him a deadly look, and Tony returns to his work. Bruce is keeping an eye on the clock, while Thor keeps the kids occupied. Clint's job is to keep his eyes open, 

"Wheaton, New Jersey."

"I was based there."

"It's probably, a trap, Rogers."'

"Doesn't matter, we should check it out."

"Tomorrow, Cap. Tonight everyone should get some rest, we'll leave first thing tomorrow."

"Okay."

"What's the plan?"

"Natasha, you feel up for a trip?"

"I'm not dead."

"Thor and Bruce will stay here. Thor can keep an eye on the kids, keep things guarded here. Bruce will be our eyes and ears. Clint is recovering. Tony, Nat, and I will go to Wheaten, New Jersey tomorrow." 


	4. Chapter 4

“Where did Captain America learn to steal a car?”, Natasha laughed.

“Nazi Germany. And we’re borrowing it.”

“You’re something else, Cap.”, Tony laughed.

"Feet off the dash, Nat!" 

"Come one, Cap. We'll have the car detailed." , Tony shrugged. 

  
"You aren't quite what I thought you'd be like.", Nat turned to Steve.   
  


“There’s a lot you don’t know about me.”

“Like?”

“I have an arrest sheet a mile long.”

“Is that so?”, Nat teases.

“I have a short fuse and a smart mouth."

"Even before?", Tony gestures at Steve's super solider body.

"Look, I lied on my enlistment forms five times. I entered enemy territory to save the 107th alone. I crashed a plane in the ocean. Is it really a surprise?"

"I think we assumed what you'd be like. To us, Captain America was a legend, a hero.", Nat offered.

"Yeah, and my Dad wouldn't shut up about you."

  
  


“The thing is, I’m just a person.”

“I like you, Steve.”

”Thanks.”

Steve told stories about growing up with Bucky, getting married, and going to war. He mentioned Howard and the rescue mission to liberate the 107th.

Before long they were arriving at Camp Leigh. Steve parked the car, and the three of them got out.

”This is it.”, Steve said.

“The files came from these coordinates.”, Tony confirms looking between his phone and the building.

”So did I.”

As they walk the ground of Camp Leigh, Steve is struck by memories of a life time ago. The ghosts of his past are magnified here.   
  


“This camp is where I was trained.”  
  


  
“Change much?”

”A little.”

  
“This is a dead end. Zero heat signatures, zero waves, not even a radio.”

”A big waste of time.”, Tony sighed.

“Whoever wrote the file must’ve used a router to throw people off.”, Nat scoffed.

  
“What is it, Steve?”, Tony asked.

Steve’s eyes scanned the property. He noticed one of the buildings was not military regulation, “Army regulations forbid storing munitions within 500 yards of the barrack.”  
  


“In English?”, Tony teased.

”This building is in the wrong place.”

Steve uses his shield to smash the lock. The three of them move in formation, cautiously through the building. They are greeted by an office space, the SSR logo.

“This is SHIELD.”, Natasha points to the logo on the wall.

”Maybe, this is where it started.”

“There is my father.”, Tony’s fingers linger on the photograph.   
  


“Who is the woman?”

  
Steve is quiet, and doesn’t answer Nat’s question, moving away from the ghosts faces of his past. 

”That’s Aunt Peggy.”

Steve stops in front of a bookshelf, “You’re already working in a secret office. Why do you need to hide the elevator? ”, he opens the false opening of the bookshelf.  
  


Using his Ironman gauntlet Tony finds the code for keypad, and the door grants them access to the elevator.

Tony, Nat and Steve walk through the dark room. It becomes illuminated as they reach the center of the room. They are surrounded by computers.   
  


“This can’t be the data pint. The technology is ancient.”

”The coordinates match.”, Tony looks up from his gauntlet.

Natasha enters the flash drive, and the screens come to life.   
  


“Initiate system.”, the computerized voice spoke.   
  


“Yes.”, Natasha types.   
  


“Shall we play a game?”, Tony asks.

"Knock it off."

“It’s from a movie...”

”I know. I saw it.”

“Rogers, Steven, born 1917. Romanoff, Natasha, born 1984. Stark, Anthony, born 1970.”

“It’s some kind of recording.”, Nat knits her eyebrows together.

  
“I am not a recording. I may not be the man I was when the Captain took me prisoner in 1945. But I am.”, the computerized voice scoffed.

"You know this thing?"

"Arnim Zola was a German scientist who worked for the Red Skull. He's been dead for years."

"Delightful.", Stark deadpanned. 

"First correction, I am Swiss. Second, look around you, I have never been more alive. In 1972, I received a terminal diagnosis. Science could not have my mind, but my mind was worth saving on 200,000 feet of databanks. Ypi are standing in my brain."

"How did you get here?"

"Invited."

"It was Operation Paperclip after World War II. SHIELD recruited Germany scientists with strategic value."

  
"They thought I could help their cause. I also helped my own."

"Hydra died with the Red Skull."

"Cut off one head, two more shall take its place."

"Prove it."

"Accessing archive." 

The three Avengers watch as the film begins on Zola's screens. Zola narrates photos from the war and founding days of Hydra 2.0: Hydra was founded on the belief that humanity could not be trusted to with its own freedom. What we did not realize is that you try to take that freedom they resist. The war taught us that much. Humanity needed to surrender its freedom willingly. After the war, SHIELD was founded, and I was recruited. The new Hydra grew as a beautiful parasite instead SHIELD. For 70 years, Hydra has been secretly feeding crisis, reaping war, and when history did not cooperate , history was changed.

"That's impossible, SHIELD would've stopped you."

Natasha, and Steve look at Tony as pictures of the Starks' death is shown in the reel. The Winter Solider ordered to put a hit on Howard and Maria Stark.

  
"Accidents will happen."

"My parents!", Tony shouts in anguish.

"Hydra created a world so chaotic that humanity is finally read to sacrifice its freedom to gain its security. Once the purification process is complete, Hydra's new world order will rise.We won, Captain. Your death amounts to the same as your life. A zero sum." 

Steve punches the screen in anger, and frustration. 

"As I was saying, Project Insight requires insight...."

  
"What is on this drive?"

"So, I wrote an algorithm. "

"What kind of algorithm?". Tony asks. 

  
"What does it do?", Natasha adds. 

"The answer to your question is fascinating. Unfortunately, you shall be too dead to hear it."

As the doors shut behind them, Steve tosses his shield. Natasha carefully guides a spooked, grieve stricken Tony forward, "Guys, we have a bogey headed our way. 30 seconds tops."

  
"Who fired it?"

  
"SHIELD."

:"I am afraid I have been stalling, Captain. Admit it. It is better this way."

Tony grabs the flash drive, as Steve spots a grate and tosses it aside. Following Steve's gesture, Nat and Tony duck after him into the hole.

"You're out of time.", Zola laughs. Upon impact, the three duck quickly as they can from the blast. Steve holds his shield up as everything collapses around them.  
  


Steve groans, trying to find a way out of the debris. He carries Natasha, and helps Tony to his feet. He carries Nat above ground, watching as the fire and chaos rages around them. He ducks for cover as search vehicles in mid air scanned for movement. Rumlow's team is hot on their heels as Steve and Tony navigate to safety. 

"Call in the asset.", Rumlow announces over the radio.

Steve is able to find a vehicle nearby, and hot wires it. He listens to Tony's lead on recruiting a new Avengers candidate. In Steve's absence, they had considered several applicants. Nothing felt right, but The Falcon was well qualified and based in DC. It might be difficult to convince Wilson to trust them, Stark had only met him once through Rodney. Rodney and Wilson happened to be at a fundraiser for the VA's new art education center. While Rodney and Wilson met in passing, Stark hoped it would be enough to gain trust. 

"How are you, Stark?"

"Pretty shaken, My parents were murdered by Hydra."

"I'm so, so sorry, Tony."

"I can't imagine seeing those clips were any easier for you. Hydra is pretty fucked up."

"How can I make this right?"

"You nor Barnes did anything wrong. He is being controlled. You saw the film, they're conditioning him."

  
"If it's too hard, the kids and I can move on. I can do this on my own."

"I'm not kicking you, or the kids out. And I won't stop until we get justice for Barnes. He is just as much of a victim as my parents."

"Are you sure?"

"Shut up, Rogers."

  
"Yes, sir."

Steve drives in silence, and tries to not listen to Tony's tears. Stark men might be made of iron, but even men of iron cry from time to time. Tony lets himself feel the hurt and betrayal of knowing Hydra continues to hurt his family. They drive through the early hours of the morning until they arrive at Sam's house. 

Stark knocked at Wilson's door, the three of them looked pretty awful. 

"Stark?"

"Hey, Wilson."

"I have a favor to ask." 

"Um, why are Captain America, Iron man, and Black Widow doing on my porch?" 

"We need help. A place to lay low, I can explain.", Tony raises his hands as a sign of peace. 

"Get in. Lord help me.", Sam chided closing the blinds, and making the house dark.

"Would I be able to sway your interest if I agreed to bring a new rehabilitation program for Veterans to the East Coast?"

"You better. Gonna owe me big time." 

Steve, Natasha, and Tony take turns cleaning up in the guest bath room. Steve dries off, and checks in with Nat.

"You okay?"

"Fine.", Nat grunts. 

"Talk to me."

"When I joined SHIELD, I thought I was going straight. But I guess I traded the the KGB for Hydra. I thought I knew whose lies I was telling. I guess I can't tell the difference anymore."

"There is a chance you might be in the wrong business." 

"I owe you."

"It's okay"

"If it were the other way around, and it was down to me to save your life, be honest with me, would you trust me?"  
  


"I would now. And I'm always honest."

"You seem pretty chipper for someone who just found out they died for nothing."

"I guess, I just like knowing who I'm fighting."

"I made breakfast. If you eat that sort of thing.", Sam announces, leaning in the doorway. 

Once out of the shower, and dressed Stark pulls the file on Wilson. He offers it to Steve.

Over breakfast, they discuss strategy, as Natasha proposes the first question Tony is tinkering on his busted gauntlet, a screwdriver between his teeth. 

"Who at SHIELD could launch a domestic missile strike?" 

"Pierce.", Steve answers. 

"Who happens to be sitting on top of the of the most secure building in the world."

  
"But he's not working alone."

Steve with the dossier in hand approaches Wilson, "We are officially considering you for the Avengers."

"I accept."

"I know what it's like to be retired. I can't ask you to do this. You got out for a good reason, Sam."

"You went off the grid too, Cap. Must've had a good reason to join the fight again." 

"It's personal."

  
"Dude, Captain America, Iron man, and Black Widow need my help. There is no better reason to get back in." 

"Tell me where can we get our hand a pair of wings?"

"Fort Meade behind three guarded gates and a 12 inch steel wall."

"Shouldn't be a problem.", Steve shrugged. 


End file.
